Inner – directed
Guided by their hearts
Truthful to themselves and others
Feeling inner value just for being in this world
AT THEIR BEST:
Committing to others and the goals
It is important for you:
goals, achievements and
acceptance from others
You do not feel good:
when you feel insignificant and without any inner value
People of this type are charming, energetic, attractive, and very goal - oriented. They are great diplomats and very status-conscious. Type Threes are good at achieving goals and following through on the daily tasks which they see as required on the path to their personal success. They are incredibly adaptable and very good at developing themselves. They are great representatives and have a natural ability to motivate others. If they are in harmony with themselves they are the best example of true authenticity.
Achievers are generally open people who cherish strong values. They always seek close connection with others. The only problem they experience is that they cannot fully express themselves to the world, as they feel afraid that others will not accept them for who they truly are. We already know that a negative evaluation for them equates to not being loved; and if others do not love you, no one needs you.
By forgetting themselves and their emotions, they put all of their focus on well-planned behavior that could guarantee acceptance. For the Achievers, it is hard to understand that others can love them without their achievements, for who they are simply as human beings. It is important to mention that they suppress a lot of their personal needs and qualities in order to receive the acceptance of others. They can hardly define who they are, and only seek to become their own imagined picture of a successful person. They believe that once they become that person, they will earn acceptance and love of others. This inner need leads Number Threes to direct all of their energy to maintain their falsely created self-image instead of discovering what is truly important to them.
It all started in childhood. The Type Three in his/her early days received the message from their surroundings that it was not okay to have feelings and to be who they were. They experienced a moment where they felt not being loved by their guardians, and in order to cope with this big pain in their hearts they learned to adapt and did everything that caused others to love and accept them.
Personal growth for Achievers begins when they decide to look into their own hearts, staying true to themselves in any given moment. They rediscover that they hold an inner value just for being in this world. In this moment they relax, find peace, and for the first time see themselves for who they truly are. This awareness awakens deep gratitude, through which they finally experience personal acceptance and freedom to act from their heart.
What other people of your type say about themselves:
I always give priority to my work;
I can easily imagine my life in 5–10 years (what I will do, where I will live);
It is easy for me to create goals for myself and take steps to reach them. I can tell step by step what I need to do to reach any goal;
It is important to me that others will value me;
I am a very good example for others;
I am very motivated and easily inspire others;
Recognition from others is very important;
For me it is very easy to adapt: I can be whatever the situation requires me to be;
I always create a lot of things to do. I am always busy;
Rest for me means the same as doing nothing;
Rest for me is cleaning, reading a book, cooking and so on.
I am always doing something;
When I am with others, I always suppress my true self and adapt to my surroundings;
I am afraid of intimacy, because there are things I keep as weaknesses;
It is hard to share my problems and failures. I ignore them and try to hide from them.
Questions to help understand yourself better
Do you often adapt to people in your surroundings, looking for approval that they value you positively?
Is it hard for you to share your failures?
Does it annoy you when others do not follow agreements and change your plans?
Would you say that work is who you are? If your career goes well you feel a huge personal worth; and if anything goes wrong, you feel like you do not deserve others' attention?
Is it important for you to be a successful person?
If you answered “yes” 4 out of 5 times, you most likely hold
the dominant personality type of Achiever.
Focused on goals
Detachment from feelings
Focus on ends
Focused on principles
Suppression of feelings
Focus on means
Focus on competition
Focus on enjoyment
Inflated plans & desires
Practices for personal growth:
Notice when you begin to identify strongly with your job. Observe how what you do becomes who you are. Feel how something inside is trying to hide under something you consider valuable.
Notice when you give yourself up in order to meet a situation or fit in someone’s world. Feel how you give up your true thoughts and feelings so you can receive validation from others.
Pay attention to the moments when you think that your ability to work is inexhaustible, and that you do not need rest.
Compete only with yourself. Try to be better than you were yesterday. If you compare yourself with others, there will always be someone better, richer, and more successful. It will just cause disharmony and jealousy in you.
Allow yourself to be yourself in all areas of life. Analyze whether what you are saying is really what you want to say, or what you are doing is really what you want to do.
If you wish to discover more practices for personal growth,
check out our brand-new exercise book made specifically for Type Three.
for personal growth
This exercise book was created uniquely to support the personal growth of Enneagram type Three.