So you think you are a number one? In
Enneagram this is also known as THE REFORMER.
Please read the description of this enneagram type below:
People of this type are typically perfectionists. They believe that they have to be good and do what is right, in order to be loved by others. They have imagined ideals which they try to live up to and help others to do the same. They hold the intention for everybody to become closer to perfection. They feel inside that they have a "mission" which makes them always want to improve life and the lives of others.
It is important for you:
To improve your surroundings, follow the rules and do the right thing.
For the Reformer, idealism wakes up their energy and motivates them to work hard and live up to created standards. Their faith and belief in perfection divides the world which they experience into that which meets their ideals and that which doesn't. In other words, divided into good and bad, right and wrong. It is from here that they find the inspiration to improve their surroundings, in order for them to become closer to the ideals in their head.
In focussing all of their effort toward this constant improvement they can experience anger toward others that they are not doing the same.
People who belong to this type tend to compare reality with how it is supposed to be and have difficulty accepting it as it is. Their inner critic puts them in a state of judgment, which promotes a sense of inadequacy. By living with this outward-facing, judgment based focus they do not allow any space to care for themselves and their true needs. This leads them on the endless journey of becoming a "good and right" human being.
This "right and wrong" understanding of the world doesn't allow the Reformer to experience negative emotions. They deem emotions such as anger to be wrong, afraid to express this otherwise they imagine they will be seen as "bad people". This results in suppression of these "bad" emotions, often held just beneath the surface.
When the Reformer can release the belief that love and validation only come if you are good and following the rules, they begin to bring a valuable view which is ethical and honest. They start to understand that there is more than one right way to live, and they accept feelings of "not enough" and inadequacy in themselves and others.
The Reformer can have very high standards and these can drive them to realize something bigger. Their personal journey starts, when they question what they really want, rather than just acting in the way that is "right".
What other people of your type say about themselves:
I love to take responsibility.
I always feel like I have a "mission".
I always follow my word. If I say I will do it, I will.
I have strong critic inside, which controls my thoughts, words and things I do.
I try to be perfect and feel very responsible that everything should be done in the right way.
I become angry when someone does not follow rules and standards.
I have ideals in my head and try to live up to them.
I usually say what I think.
I am afraid to make mistakes.
It is very common for me to control my emotions and personal needs.
I have strong self-control.
I have high standards for myself and others.
For me honesty is important.
I want to be right.
I value everything as right or not right, good or bad; there is no middle-ground for me.
I always follow rules and standards.
If you do not feel balanced
How to get along with you:
Help me by sharing responsibilities.
Praise my achievements.
I always ask a lot of myself. Please remind me that I am good enough as I am.
Evaluate what I do.
Take care of the things which you are responsible for.
Apologize if you don't act in the right way. That will help me to forgive you.
Help me to laugh at myself, but please don't discredit my worries.
My life story
“Do you know when I start feeling free? When the realization finally comes to me that no matter how much I believed that I was doing what I really wanted in life, I truly wasn‘t. I thought that all of my decisions were free and that was what I wanted. I had a few friends who seemed “weak” to me, who often repeated that I am thinking too logically and making decisions without listening to my heart. Of course, I didn’t believe them… But as I walked through life I always faced the same feedback, just from different people, until I finally realized that there were a lot of things in my heart that I wouldn’t think of doing for fear of being judged by others. I would find logical justifications about why one action or the other would be wrong to act on. Although I’m still finding myself a little bit hesitant to act on some things, my heart's decisions now take priority. The judgment of others is the only opinion. They judge themselves - not me. I am free to choose, regardless of the opinion of others. ”
- Abby, 29.
"I constantly feel overwhelmed by the desire to do just the right thing in every situation, to control my feelings and thoughts so that they don't slip out into the view of others, and if they accidentally get out, I try to express them in the right way. I constantly feel anger inside, and the more I experience that feeling the more I judge myself that it is not good to feel this way and that I am a bad person. I am already aware of my problem and I am trying to practice observing my feelings and to see where they are coming from. I ask myself often: „What truly makes me angry in this situation?“ You will be surprised at what I sometimes discover. ”
- Thomas, 30 .
"I feel so tense and serious. Inside, I feel a constant feeling that everything has to be in its places and done right. And it doesn't matter what it is: a party, a conversation, a trip, a presentation or even the way a room is displayed. I can be quite a difficult personality voicing my opinion toward others, for example, if I see a teacher giving incomplete or not entirely correct information. Everything must be done correctly, according to priorities. At some point, I was proud of having this view, but more and more often I start to feel tired of asking so much of myself."
– Carol, 25 .
Questions to help understand yourself better
Do you have clear rules and "package" of values by which you value your surroundings?
Do you think you need to be good and right to be accepted and loved?
Do you feel angry than someone breaks the rules?
Is it easy for you to see other's mistakes?
Do you often reject what you like, for what you think would be right to do?
People like you: Examples: Confucius, Plato, Salahuddin Ayyubi, Joan of Arc, Sir Thomas More, Mahatma Gandhi, Pope John Paul II, Nelson Mandela, Margaret Thatcher, Prince Charles, Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, Jimmy Carter, Michelle Obama, Al Gore, Hilary Clinton, Rudy Giuliani, Elliot Spitzer, Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, Osama bin Laden, George Bernard Shaw, Thoreau, Dr. Jack Kevorkian, Anita Roddick (The Body Shop), Martha Stewart, Chef Thomas Keller, Michio Kushi (macrobiotics), George Harrison, Joan Baez, Celine Dion, Ralph Nader, Noam Chomsky, Bill Moyers, George F. Will, William F. Buckley, Keith Olbermann, Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Maher, Tina Fey, Katherine Hepburn, Maggie Smith, Emma Thompson, Julie Andrews, Vanessa Redgrave, Jane Fonda, Meryl Streep, Harrison Ford, Helen Hunt, Captain “Sully” Sullenberger, “Mary Poppins,” “Mr. Spock,” SNL’s “The Church Lady”
Still doubting your type?
Get in touch or take a test here
Levels of development
Moving Healthy to Average level
My state of being which show that I am moving to average levels: Feeling a sense of personal obligation to fix everything myself
"Wake - up call" (read more) going from healthy levels to average
Moving from Average to Unhealthy level
My thoughts which shows that I am moving to unhealthy levels: My ideals are actually wrong and counterproductive
Red Flag (read more) moving to unhealthy levels
Ones let go of the belief that they are in a position to judge anything objectively and are able to approach life without emotionally reacting to it. They also paradoxically achieve their Basic Desire - to have integrity and to be good. As a result of their self- actualization, they become wise, discerning, accepting, hopeful, and often noble.
Ones focus on the dictates of their superegos to guide them in life and defend them from the "disordered" part of themselves. Self- image: "I am sensible, moderate, and objective."
Ones reinforce their self - image by trying to live their lives in accordance with their consciences and with reason. They are highly ethical and self- disciplined and possess a strong sense of purpose and conviction. Truthful and articulate, they reach by example, putting aside personal desires for the greater good.
Ones begin to fear that others are indifferent to their principles, so they want to convince others of the rightness of their viewpoint. They become serious and driven, debating others and remedying problems while evaluating their world and pointing out what is wrong with things.
Ones worry that others will condemn them for any deviation from their ideals. Having argued their point of view. Ones are now obliged to live up to it at all times, so they try to rigorously organize themselves and their world. They are punctual and methodical but also irritable and tense.
More levels we discuss in a class.
Practice for personal grow
Notice when you start to look for love and support from others by acting as a good and right person.
Notice when you express feelings different from what you feel inside.
Pay attention when you take on tasks or do the “right thing” in order to be recognized as good and not because you truly want to.
Inner peace arises when we change our relationship with anger and accept mistakes as a natural part of learning and growth. Then we can relax, because the focus shifts from making mistakes, correcting differences, to pursuing natural desires.
Pay attention when you start to criticize yourself. Is that criticism real, or does it just not meet your self-created standards? Inhale and release those thoughts several times. You are good and enough.
Accept your fear of being bad, of not always being right.
Take care of your personal desires and dreams in the first place, even if they seem illogical or do not meet other people’s expectations.
Allow yourself to act as you wish as often as possible, not as you should act according to set standards.
No one is perfect, all people make mistakes. It is a part of life that gives us the opportunity to grow.
When you feel like you are condemning yourself or others, stop for a moment and think well: is it really what you are feeling, maybe it’s an automatically formed habit?
Spend more time for yourself, relaxing where there are no goals: it could be staying with friends, playing games, being in nature, indulge in your hobby etc.
Allow yourself to accept different people and their individual views of the world.
Pay attention as you begin to justify your actions.
Take time for practices that awaken inner love for yourself, reducing excessive demand. Love and feel your being.